Pimping me out, pirate style

Saturday morning I’m hitting the road for Florida. First to Nanny’s house for a couple nights, then on to our cruise. For those of you just tuning in, Nanny is my 86 year old Irish grandmother. She married my Pappy during the war and moved from Ireland to America with him. He was a dashing American soldier so who could resist? She still has a pretty thick accent and is full of spunk. Pappy died 2 years ago and Nanny’s been down lately. I’m hoping this trip will beer her up.

We’ve been talking a lot in preparation for the trip. She’s so funny. She was telling me “Now Shannon. I can’t walk around in all that heat in Nassau so I’m going to stay on board & enjoy the ship. But perhaps you’ll meet a nice wee girl and you can visit the island with her & her family. Maybe you’ll make a friend at dinner you can tour around with.” Uh, Nanny. That’s not how this works. Hi! We’re the Smith family! Who wants to tag along on our Caribbean vacation? Oh, are you traveling with your frail, elderly grandmother? Perhaps I shall kill you both and rob you of all your posessions. Or maybe I shall sell you into a life of slavery and no DVRs or internet shopping.
I’d better set her straight before she strikes up a deal with some swarthy seaman!

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