These things need to DIE

There are a few sayings/quotes/ what have you that I feel have met the end of their days here on Earth.  They need to die.  Go peacefully into that good night or whatever.  I don’t care what you call it- I just don’t want to ever hear these things again.  I don’t ask for much from you people, but I swear, if I hear any of you saying these things or if I visit your home and find these sayings painted on some folksy wall plaque…well, I may just need to take a good, hard look at our friendship.  Now, don’t go looking at me like that, I promise I have good reasons for each one.

  • What happens in _____, stays in _____. Ugh, WE GET IT.  Way to take a cute tourism ad slogan for Las Vegas and bastardize it all over cheap merchandise and throw pillows.  And the thing is, if you’re wearing a t-shirt that says “What happens in _____, stays in _____” then you are just begging someone to ask you what happened in ____ now aren’t you?  And that just defeats the whole purpose.
  • It’s 5 o’clock somewhere! You want a cocktail.  So have one.  There is no need to explain to me or anyone else that it’s late afternoon somewhere.  You know what else?  It’s tomorrow somewhere too but I don’t use that as an excuse to smoke crack.
  • Live, Laugh, Love.   If you have to pay $24.99 to some mail order housewares catalog for a resin plaque in the shape of an old banner that you’ll hang in your house to remind you to Live, Laugh, and Love because otherwise you may actually forget to Live, Laugh, and Love then your money would be better spent elsewhere.
  • You go girl/boy! I’m so tired of this I can’t even bring myself to say something halfway witty about it.
  • I just threw up in my mouth a little. I saw a Tweet on Twitter from someone (I can’t remember who- sorry!) begging people to stop saying this.  And I totally agree.  It’s a line from a movie.  When you say it you are not being clever or original.  And since everyone seems to say it about everything that’s slightly unpleasant it has worn me slap out.  I’ll admit I said it myself once or twice a few years ago.  Then I let it go.  You should too.

Did I miss any?  What do you want people to drop from their vocabularies?

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14 thoughts on “These things need to DIE

  1. I agree with every one of these. I also caught my DAD recently saying “What up Dawg?!” ugh, please!! If 60 something white men are saying it, it’s over buddy.

  2. ‘Bra’ as in Bro.. like the way Dog the Bounty Hunter says it. I will gladly take a baseball bat to someone’s head over that one.. funny enough, I usually only hear it at the ball park. God.

    I have one more and it isn’t a saying, I get it alot when I walk Indy.. ‘oooh look at the cute little puppy, ahhh she/he is sooo cute.’ then they ask me if they can pick her up. Yea no, not so much.
    I make my husband laugh when I start doing that in a high squeaky voice when some stranger sees Indy. lol

  3. Heh. I agree with all of those, except I have a confession to make: I may have, at one time or another, uttered one(or more) of those sayings. But I was always kidding when I said them. From this day forward none of those phrases will ever leave my lips again. 🙂

  4. I hate when people instead of saying that they were given a present, that they were “gifted” it. Or when people use DH instead of just saying my husband.

  5. I’m a little annoyed by people putting “s” on the end of anyway and “ir” in front of regardless. My son, however, is vehemently against the phrase “touching base”. Isn’t it funny how things like this will just vex us?

  6. Git R Done!

    GAH! I hate this one and my colleague says it at least once a day! It’s like fingernails on a blackboard, and I immediately tune her out and go to the penguins.

  7. that whole last one makes me want to puke… just the thought of it makes my stomach upset… so why would anyone want to say that as a part of a normal conversation? Ugh… stupid people lol…

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