Oh oh oh afternoon delight

I swear CSP & I are the worst at being on time anywhere. We could have a clear schedule all day with one appointment in the afternoon and still be pushing it to get there on time. Oy. We tried to get our passports this afternoon but Jon’s birth certificate was apparently not an official enough copy. Oh well, we’ll try again in a couple weeks with a new officialler copy (it should be here in a couple of days).
Well, since I’ve posted about pooping I figured the gloves are off so I’d tell y’all about what happened the other afternoon. Our neighbor & good friend C needed to borrow CSP’s truck. We were on the phone chatting and after we decided we’d meet up in about a half hour so I could give her the keys to the truck we joked about how we should start a phone sex business to make extra money. We laughed about how neither of us could utter phrases such as “oh yeah, ride me like the Kentucky Derby” without cracking up so we’d be terrible phone sex ladies. We tried out a few choice phrases though then hung up the phone. Apparently my phone sex skills did not go unnoticed by CSP and the next 20 minutes or so found us in a delicate situation. The phone rang and it was C. She’d been standing outside our front door ringing the doorbell for the last 10 minutes! I felt horrible! She understood though and we had a good laugh. Thank goodness for good neighbors!

Your Mama doesn’t buy Lite Beer.

That’s what my MIL told CSP last night so he wouldn’t have to worry she was wasting her money on crap beer.
We went to dinner at the in-laws’ last night to visit with Jon’s Gramy who’s in town from Minnesota. OMG is that woman a crack up. Jon's Gramy85 yrs old and lives alone in a big house in MN. She brought all these little photo albums full of pictures of her sidewalk (she doesn’t like the way it was poured), various snow and ice storms, and my favorite, car accidents that occur in front of her house. She lives on a corner lot at a busy intersection. There were pics of bashed up cars, cars going on the tow truck, the works. We wish she would move down here to be closer to her family and so we could hang out more, but she’s fiercely independent so I think a move is still a ways off. We ended up visiting until almost midnight!

Keep your hands to yourself

I’m a girl of a curious nature. And if I see something I’m interested in, I’m probably gonna touch it. This drives CSP up the wall. Lately if I do something he doesn’t approve of he reminds me that when Ling Ling comes home I’m going to have some behaviors to change.
-You’re not gonna be able to spend 30 minutes on that stool in the bathroom doing your makeup.
-Sometimes you’re not going to be able to take a shower. You might need to learn to wear hats.
-You can’t go around touching everything. There are germs. And this isn’t Discovery Place.
-You’re gonna have to speed up your poops.*

*This one I’m afraid of. I heard somewhere that if you strain too much you can die on the toilet from some thing that sounds like baseball bagel. I don’t know all the details but I heard enough that the idea of someone finding me dead on the toilet scares the, well, the you know what out of me. Everyone knows Elvis was found on the crapper. Does anyone remember how Bob Hope died? No. Of course you don’t. Because he died a dignified death far away from a toilet.

Not nearly as organized as I wish I were

I’ve received lots of emails and comments about the new country and I’m composing a FAQ post to cover everything, but it’s not quite done yet. It will be up soon though. I want to make sure all of my facts are straight. I’m currently in a back and forth with our new case worker and that’s part of the delay.
In other news…I thought I lost my camera over the weekend and it nearly made me sick to my stomach. I had CSP looking all through our cars while I looked in the house. It was in my purse the whole time.
My excema is crazy terrible right now. All down my arms and legs. I put medicine on every day and I’m still sporting the lizard lady look this summer. Try not to be jealous.
I have loads more to tell you but no time right now. More eloquent & entertaining posts to come I promise!

Well, when you say it like that….

Today I went to lunch with my mom, Gmommy, Sara, & Joey.Hey baby, dig my inflatable lid?Then we went so my Mom & Gmommy could see Sara & Marc’s new house. Well, new to them. They currently live in a new construction house they’ve been in for a year and a half but they found a deal on an older house that they’re going to fix up.
Now, we were supposed to go up to the mountain house with Gmommy for the Memorial Day weekend but we stayed home and brought Gmommy up to see us instead. Why? I think it’s best explained when I repeat to y’all an excerpt of the conversation I had with Lisa the other day. I’m sure I’m paraphrasing some of this as my memory isn’t as sharp as Lisa’s. (Lisa’s part is in italics)

I thought y’all were going to the mountains?
We were but we’re staying home now.
Why?
Roger got in a fight.
Roger? Your Mom’s cat?
Yeah. Apparently it was a bad fight and now he has a hole in his chest and Mom has to put antibiotics in it twice a day.
See, that’s why I don’t have pets. ‘Oh I can’t go on vacation because of my cat. And it’s not like it’s even a dog. It’s an animal who doesn’t even really like me. But I feed it and it runs around my house. And now I have to stay home from vacation to put medicine in my cat’s hole!’

Yo, Gmommy

GrandmommyMy Mom picked my Grandmommy up for the weekend. We went to lunch, then to get pedicures, then to see Shrek 3. You may remember me telling you about how my Gmommy has alzheimer’s. Well, as you can imagine it gets worse each time I see her. At this point she has a hard time with conversations as she can’t really complete sentences very often. But she seemed to have a really good time with us today and laughed a lot. She’s also in this flashing phase. We got flashed at lunch so she could show us her bra, then to show us where she had an itch on her belly. She also goes to the bathroom constantly. At lunch she went a few times. The restaurant has a “Learn Italian” type track running while you’re in the restroom. On the way out of the restroom the speaker said “What time is it?” and just as we were about to hear how to ask the time in Italy, Gmommy yelled “I don’t know what time it is!!”. She had a good time though and seemed to really enjoy the movie.

M.I.A.

This week has been so busy. Jon was off Tuesday and Wednesday so we did a bunch of adoption related running around. Tuesday night after errand running we went to dinner at our favorite Mexican joint where CSP enjoyed a mega cerveza.Jumbo cervezaThen Wednesday we did some more adoption running around (courthouse for background checks) then went to my doctor for my pre-op physical. I had to have a chest film, CBC & EKG (EEG?). I felt like an episode of ER! While we were there my fabulous Dr. filled out our new Medical forms for our adoption. The new country’s form is of course different from China and Guat. He also did a quick physical for CSP & gave CSP his 2nd Hep shot. I’ve decided to go ahead and blog about where we’re adopting from. It will be in a separate post though, password protected. Stay tuned!
Anyway, Wednesday night was all about the LOST season finale. Thursday I was poked and prodded some more at the OBGYN’s with a pre-op ultra sound and Pap smear. Fun times. My hysterectomy has been scheduled for June 29th. Not sure if I’ve told y’all that yet. I’m excited because I’m pretty sure our paperchase will be over before my surgery. We’ve had to go back and re-do a few things because of the country changes, but we’re nearing the end!

Strange-ology

Strange-ology Tag
Found this over at Krista’s.

FOOD-OLOGY
What is your salad dressing of choice?
Ginger Mandarin
What is your favorite fast food restaurant?
Moe’s or Qdoba if I have time to run in. If it’s drive through then Jack in the Box or Chik-fil-A
What is your favorite sit-down restaurant?
Have no clear cut fave. Depends on what I’m in the mood to eat.
On average, what size tip do you leave at a restaurant?
20% unless the service sucked.
What food could you eat every day for two weeks and not get sick of?
Mexican
What is your favorite type of gum?
I’m not a fan of gum. I don’t like having to get rid of it. So I’ll take a mint please.

TECHNOLOGY
What is your wallpaper on your computer?
A picture I took of a rose at the McGill Rose Garden a couple weeks ago. I swap out the wallpaper every week or so.

How many televisions are in your house?
3
How do you listen to music?
the iPod, the computer, or on an xm station through the tv

BIOLOGY
What’s your best feature?
My eyes, or my teeth- I ended up with fairly straight white teeth without braces. And I have pretty good hair. It’s baby fine but it always seems to do pretty well.
Have you ever had anything removed from your body?
Tonsils, wisdom teeth, adnoids, left fallopian tube, and at the end of the month- my uterus.
Which of your five senses do you think is keenest?
No idea. My sight is going. Same with my hearing. Maybe my 6th sense?
When was the last time you had a cavity?
Within the last few years.
What is the heaviest item you lifted last?
Molly. oy.
Have you ever been knocked unconscious?
I don’t remember if I’ve been knocked out by an item or person, but I’ve been put under at the hospital for surgery.

BULLSHIT-OLOGY (Who made this up?)
If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die?
No it’d stress me out. I wouldn’t enjoy my life as much.
Is love for real?
I agree with CJ’s & Krista’s answer. Which is yes and it comes in many different forms.
If you could change your first name, what would you change it to?
I think I’m good with what I have.
What color do you think looks best on you?
Black. It’s slimming. And aqua.
Have you ever swallowed a non-food item by mistake?
Yes.
Have you ever saved someone’s life?
Not that I can recall. Although my little sister once fell in the pool and I told my mom about it so they pulled her out. But I’ve never pulled anyone from a burning building or performed CPR.
Has someone ever saved yours?
Yes. The hospital staff when they removed my tube. Apparently if it had popped it could have killed me.

DARE-OLOGY
Would you walk naked for a half mile down a public street for $100,000?
In a hot minute. Cause then I’d move and never have to see those people again anyway.
Would you kiss a member of the same sex for $100?
Sure.
Would you allow one of your little fingers to be cut off for $200,000?
No. But like Krista said, you can have a little toe.
Would you never blog again for $50,000?
I want to say yes, but I don’t know if I could do it.
Would you pose nude in a magazine for $250,000?
Only if I could be seriously retouched.
Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for $1,000?
Absolutely.
Would you give up watching television for a year for $25,000?
As long as I could still watch dvds on tv then I’m all set.

DUMB-OLOGY
What is in your left pocket?
No pocket. No pants.
Is Napoleon Dynamite actually a good movie?
Hilarious!
Do you have hardwood or carpet in your house?
carpet. but one day we’ll replace it all with bamboo floors.
Do you sit or stand in the shower?
Stand. Who sits? I don’t have time for sitting in the shower.
Could you live with roommates?
Been there. Done that. Now I live with CSP. I suppose he’s a roommate of sorts.
How many pairs of flip-flops do you own?
I used to have like 20. Then I discovered Crocs. Now I just have 3 pair of Crocs flops.
Last time you had a run-in with the cops?
What am I, a hooligan? Who has run ins with cops? I got a few tickets a few years ago.
What do you want to be when you grow up?
Who knows? What if that never happens?
Last friend you talked to?
Lisa.
Last person you called?
CSP at work.

RANDOM-OLOGY
First place you went this morning?
To pee.
What can you not wait to do?
This is the obvious answer… hold our daughter for the first time.
What’s the last movie you saw?
Happy Feet. Way cute.

So, if anyone would like to participate…consider yerself tagged!