~Do you ever wonder what you look like to other people? Sometimes mid conversation I’ll find myself thinking things like Does my face look weird right now? Why is she/he looking at me like that? I bet my mouth moves around all funny. Or you go through life thinking you look one way then you see a candid photo of yourself and think- who the hell is that?
~I don’t like the word cusp. I don’t ever want to be on the cusp of anything. It sounds like something you can barely get out of your mouth. cusp. bleh.
~Lately I’ve been craving Chef Boyardee beef ravioli like a mad woman. No idea why. But for some reason, right now, it is soooo good. Even bought the mega pack at Sams. Periodically I’ll go through cravings like that- one week all I’ll want to eat is cereal or something. Right now it is canned pasta. Wonder why that is.
~My eyebrows are out of control. For no apparent reason over the last few weeks they have decided that midday they will turn up on the ends like I’m Jack Nicholson or something. It’s maddening.
~I wish I knew how to make a cute little banner for my blog.

Birthday Blunder

A certain birthday girl needs to remember that her birthday is coming up very shortly while shopping online or the following conversation will occur:

J: (looking at current issue of Real Simple) Is this yours? Do you have a subscription?
S: Yeah. That’s my first issue.
J: Great. Well, be surprised when my Mom gives you a subscription next week.

Yikes! Lesson learned.

Almost Famous

Have any of you seen the new R. Ke!ly video about being stuck in a closet and it’s part one of five? I saw the whole thing, all 5 parts last night and they were talking about it all like it was some amazing revolutionary song and video. Ok, this dude wrote a bad story about adultery, then sang it, then made a video that acted out each word literally. Like he’s in the closet after spending the night with some girl and now he’s hiding from her husband and his cell goes off and he sings “I tried so hard to put it on vi-i-i-brate”. OMG. Dude, I can totally write a story and sing it. And like the music my boy listens to- all screaming, all the time. I can totally scream. Or those thin vocals on all the teen queen cds now- hey, I can whisper too!
And just the other day my friend Karen (who just got her referral! woohoo!) told me about a girl who blogs about not being able to get pregnant and some tv producer read her blog and now she’s getting a sitcom! That’s my money she’s making! I mean, my family is nuts- I couldn’t make this stuff up if I tried!
Ah well, living in California would freak me out- with all the mudslides and stuff. Maybe it’s better to be unknown and poor in the South!

Baby got back

Bingo back that is. Last night Shannon, Stacy, and I went and played bingo.. So fun! We didn’t win a dime, but we had a blast. There were so many people there, serious bingo players with trolls, millions of dawbers, custom seat cushions, the works. Us newbies walked in in a daze and if it weren’t for 2 helpful women at the next table we’d have been lost. We were all so focused on trying to keep up with the crazy pace of the bingo caller while playing up to 12 cards at a time (!!!), I’d forget to breathe! Spending 3 hours hunched over a bunch of bingo cards will kill your back! No wonder they buy those custom cushions!

Adopting Pros

Ok, no one told me about the incredible volume of paperwork that would land on my house as soon as we applied to adopt. I mean, I knew it was a paperchase, but I just feel so sorry for the entire forest that has died so far for our family! I’ve also learned that I should install a Kinko’s in the living room to deal with the number of copies I have to make. Ah well, it is a small price to pay.

I’ve already discovered so many pros about adopting:
-You can still enjoy a nice cocktail all the way up to Gotcha day. Pregnant ladies can’t touch the stuff! (disclaimer: I’m by no means a big drinker- maybe 2 a month)
-No hormone induced puking.
-No strange desires to eat laundry detergent or dirt.
-No screaming for an epidural.
-You get a chance to visit a country you may never visit otherwise.
-No need to drop a bundle of money on clothes you’ll only wear for 9 months.
-I’d much rather have my life on display paper wise vs. having my girlie bits on display in the delivery room!
-I’d rather eat pinecones than go to the girlie doctor, and when you’re pregnant you have to go like every half hour.
-Strangers don’t approach me wanting to rub my belly.

I’ve totally come to terms with not being able to get pregnant. I’m so fine with it because I realized a while back that what I really wanted was not to be pregnant (a condition that lasts but a few months), but to be a mother and to have a family (something that lasts forever). Hmmm…did I miss any pros on my list?

I want to ride my bicycle, I want to ride it where I go

I need to get in shape before going to China. I want to be able to carry a baby around with ease while touring the cities. And, I just need to get in shape. So I was thinking about what I like to do that counts as excersize and came up with roller skating and bike riding. I have skates, it’s just finding skate partners that’s hard. Plus you have to pay the rink and it becomes a whole event. So on top of that I needed something I could do around here, for free, at any time of day. So Jon and I started looking at bikes for me. He’s already outfitted with a good bike and even those weird little clip on shoes that clip to the pedals. He’s into it. I wanted a bike that I didn’t have to lay down on to ride, with a big cushy seat to hold my big cushy seat. We found the Electra bikes and I found a local store to order one in for me. We picked it up yesterday and the bike dude even put on a bell and removable basket for me. I LOVE IT SO MUCH! It is so comfy to ride and my purse fits in the basket along with a water bottle. And when I stop I can stand straight up on the ground without falling off (short legs). I should be a super model by this time next week. ;)

When you’re adopting you get to drink fun cocktails

Tonight I had the pleasure of having dinner with 5 other adoptive moms to be. We’re all adopting from China and are at various stages of the process. We had dinner at Logan’s and they were nice enough to let us chat and laugh for way longer than your normal dinner. I asked for something fun and fruity to drink, and they brought me this humongo jar of fabulous fruity flavor! Many more were ordered around the table. It was so great to meet Melissa, Susan and Danesha (a blog virgin), and to spend more time with Shannon and Karen.

Here’s where I get a little sappy. When we first found out we couldn’t get pregnant we were devastated. Then we went through a grieving process, then discovered adoption. Since then, things have been so wonderful. Everyone is so supportive and wonderful and I looked around that table tonight and about cried. Here were 6 women who are just genuinely happy for each other. Terrifically supportive of one another. There’s no competition. We’re all in the same boat financially, no one’s buying $800 strollers. Plus, we’ve all been through some really tough stuff getting to where we are today, and we all know that. There’s no cattiness, no gossip. Just 6 women who truly appreciate each other and the journey we are all on together.

Wet & Wild

Yesterday afternoon I drove up to Greensboro with my mom, Hale & Morgan to go to Emerald Pointe, a huge water park. We went last night for just a couple of hours, and since there were no lines, and no sunburn potential, we got to ride all the big rides and pack a ton of stuff into just 2 hours. We stayed at a fabulous resort that Jon and I had seen lots of times on the side of the highway but we’d never stopped in. Who knew such a nice place was in the middle of nowhere? There was a big golf tourney going on with basketball stars raising money for basketball camps for kids. Michael Jordan stayed just a few doors down from us! Alonzo Mourning was there too. We saw tons of giant men with tiny women dripping in jewels.
This morning we went to breakfast at Denny’s because Hale had seen some new dish on a commercial and was hell bent to try it. So I can cross eating at Denny’s off my list of things I’ve never done. We spent the rest of the day at the water park and had a blast. All the boys were staring at Miss Morgan. One dude even walked right into a trash can and toppled the whole thing over. I used 45 spf and they have HUGE umbrellas there so not a bit of sunburn on my fish belly white body. Success!

We’re official

So…We are officially on our way to becoming parents! We applied with our agency on Saturday. We received our approval email on Monday. Throughout this week we’ve received enough forms to fill out that we could wallpaper the house. If everything stays on schedule we should be in China this time next year (how cool would that be to spend my birthday in China becoming a mom?!). If we run into delays (which are inevitable) we may be in China anytime between August and October 2006, which is also fine as it may be cooler temperature wise in October. Either way we are just psyched. So excited! Let the paper chase begin! Ling Ling (and hopefully Mei Mei) here we come!

Oh, and duh, the job situation. Forgot to mention that. I’ve accepted an offer for a job I’m really excited about. But I’m also halfway through a very comprehensive (personality tests, multiple phone interviews already!) interview process for another exciting job. So we’ll see which one turns out to be the best deal. One is commission only and for a small company, but has lots of perks. The other is a large corp that also has perks, but requires a great deal of travel. I’ll update when I choose. Both have good income potential, so we know we’ll be all set with the adoption as long as we are diligent in our savings and have some fundraisers like yard sales. We’ll get there!

Wash, Set, Baby

So I’m sitting in the salon the other day while Morgan is having her first facial. That child is so spoiled. I waited until I was an adult before getting a facial like normal people. Anyway, I’ve been going to this same salon for a good while now to get my hair cut, and this is a small Southern town so I know everyone there. I walked in with Morgan and said hi to all the ladies then we were in the facial room for 2 hours. The esthetician facial lady- God love her- can talk like no one I know. This facial was supposed to be 30 minutes, but R talks with her hands.
We’re in there 10 minutes when Mindy, another salon employee bursts in.
M-Shannon, you still want a baby?
S-(amused and a little frightened) Yeah, why, someone forget one in your room?
M-What? No. Ok, I’ll be right back.
5 minutes pass and Mindy comes back.
M-Ok so I just helped this girl and I thought she looked a little different than normal. Then I heard her talking to Jane and sure enough she’s 4 months pregnant. She’s in school at (local university, but I’m trying to protect said girl’s identity here) and she’s real smart you know. So I said how does your boyfriend feel about it? And she said her boyfriend is real smart too and they don’t want it and they want to give it up for adoption. So I said to myself “Mindy- this is a sign. Here I got one girl in one room who wants a baby and one girl who doesn’t.” So I ran back in here to get you.
S-Get me? For what?
M-You need to talk to this girl. I told her if she met you she’d like you so much she’d just give up her baby in a heartbeat.
OMGOMGOMG. The world has gone insane around me.
S-Mindy, that is really sweet of you to think of me, but I can’t just go up to pregnant people and make a bid for their babies.
M-Oh hold on.
She leaves the room again and I am floored. Gobsmacked. In shock. Mindy comes back in.
M-Dammit she left. (probably ran screaming from the salon!) She told Jane though that she wants to give her baby to a family from up North because she’s from up North. I’m sorry Shannon, I tried.
S-Really, it is ok. We’re very happy with our plans to adopt from China.
M-Well I just figured, why go all the way to China to get a baby when all you gotta do is go to the salon? Oh, and I gave her your name and number just in case.

OMG. My name and number has been given to some poor girl who is in the process of making what is I’m sure to be the hardest decision of her life and here she probably thinks I was sitting in the next room with my checkbook at the ready. You know, at first Jon and I lamented on all the hoops and paperwork we have to deal with to adopt. Now I know why. It’s to protect people from well intentioned, yet over eager salon staff.